It’s happened to the best of us: cheating. Sure, there are different definitions of what constitutes cheating—flirty emails and texts or in-person, flirty behavior—but one thing is consistent: someone always get hurt. And on top of the pain, surviving cheating is a whole other issue. What do we do? Do we leave? Do we stay?
This woman submerged her boyfriend’s Apple electronic devices in water when she found out he cheated. Others take the cheating partner back, only for it to happen again. “I wasn’t going to risk my heart anymore,” said Katie, a New York-based Bustle reader in regards to finding out her boyfriend was having a fling with his trainer—for the second time. “I wondered why his sessions were always so long, and why he’d shower before going to the gym, but I trusted him when he said nothing was going on. I even met her while it was going on and she was really nice.”
Others say it takes work to stay together, and I agree. Both parties have to be invested enough in each other not to stray.
“Monogamy is not something that happens automatically because you make a one-time vow when you first commit to each other. Monogamy is something you choose every day, it is a gift you give your partner and yourself, it is a sacred practice like yoga or meditation. And with practice, you will get better and better at it.” –Tammy Nelson, PhD.
We spoke to Bustle readers about their experiences with cheating, and the aftermath. We also spoke to some experts on how to overcome it, if you want to overcome it. Here’s what they had to say.